For all of us our love language to God is different. For some of us the area that stirs our hearts the most might be missions, intercession, reading His word, fasting, serving, and the list goes on. While all of these areas of loving on God and allowing Him to love on us are all important each of us has that one language that just makes our heart swell. After having a conversation with my husband Tommy this past weekend I came to this conclusion, our love language does not just pertain to our parents, spouse, children, etc., but it also pertains to God.
Tom and I had not attended a service at Gateway since the passing of his father Bill. We as a family all loaded up in the cars and headed to the new Southlake campus for the Grand Opening service. I can remember walking in and just feeling so overwhelmed, not only had we been so emotionally drained from the projects of putting together the special details for dads service and still pretty shell shocked by the loss of such a special person, now we were enveloped in what was a huge celebration for our church family. There are not really words to describe the swirl of emotions that were buzzing about that day. We say we cry happy tears because we know that Dad is in a better place, but in a lot of ways even now 6 months later…the tears are instigated by the pain of losing him.
I am rabbit trailing a bit but I will get to my point. We walked into the building in Southlake this past Saturday and it is amazing how even though since we moved to Oregon and back we have only actually been into the building like 3 times, it always feels like home. I have been doing webcast but we know that there is a great significance to taking our children, so we have made a choice and we are sticking to it. I had not realize the emotion that we had tied to that building, when I walked into the sanctuary and it all came back to me. You know those feelings that you get (not excited but afraid) the first day of school where you need to hold on so tight to your mom’s hand cause you are not sure what to expect from others let alone yourself. We took our seats and Tom and I just sat quietly as we waited for worship to start. Watching all the people “move about the cabin”, hehe when one of the pastors came out and announced that they were doing a live recording that day. Worship started and man my heart just swelled, like being swept off my feet that day like I never had before. My Abba Daddy was there that day to meet me where I was…and I am so glad He knew where I was because honestly I was not so sure myself.
It is amazing the condemnation we put on ourselves when we don’t or aren’t doing what, by society’s measuring stick, we should be doing and how that condemnation, if we let it, can cause us to withhold and miss out on having that waltz with the Lord that just overtakes us and just brings “Spring” with it.
Spring- renewal, fresh, new, rested; these are just a few of the ways I would describe Spring. God is like Spring when we have just finished toiling through the summer, tackled the fall, rested through the winter, He is Spring. I of course am not referring to an actual year timeline or the actual seasons that the words, Summer, Fall and Winter represent, I am referring to LIFE.
Life takes us in all sorts of directions, some of those directions makes sense and some of them don’t, but no matter what direction we are traveling God is always there waiting for us to invite Him along. Of course by invite I mean surrender our will for His, acknowledge that we are trusting in Him to guide us and then let go ‘surrender’ let him do the driving without correcting how close he is parked to the car next to us, or that we think a different route would be faster.
So after the service was over on Saturday Tom said to me, “I don’t understand how people that have not been to church in a log time get excited about worship, is it just cause that is what they are supposed to do, or is it something more? (this is a paraphrase of course)” I instantly knew he was referring to me, for me in that service and really any setting where we are worshiping, with the strum of the first guitar string, I am all in. It is the one area of worship that I surrender completely without reservation, there is no holding back. Worship is my love language to God. I can stand in a room (whether it is live, CD, or just me singing) close my eyes and get lost in the music. Feeling every vibration deep in my soul…becoming enveloped in His presence and nothing else matters. Worship is the one thing that I could do all day long, every day, without ceasing.
So to describe how it makes me feel, how it wakes me up…you know how when you play a guitar or a drum even or how about a “Krazy Kazoo”, lol. Noah made a “Krazy Kazoo” for a science project last week, we took a foil paper tube put wax paper at the end and fastened it on with a rubber band, and then we had to put a dime sized hole in it to let the air pass through…so when you talk or hum into it, it makes music. Seems simple enough, our love language is how we communicate, granted He also speaks to me through dreams, and visions. But there is nothing that captures my heart like worship….Worship for me is that “dime sized” hole that allows for the vibration in my life. So if you try making that “Krazy Kazoo” at home after it is done hum into it and when you do place your finger on the wax paper and feel that vibration. That vibration is your “love language” with God. What does that vibration represent in your life? For me it is Praise and Worship, but for you it might be something different.
Tom and I are still working through the pain of the loss, as are our children. But we have to choose to recognize what our love language is with God and allow ourselves to become immersed in it, which in turn will heal us and allow Him to fill the void. Perhaps you haven’t lost a parent, maybe it was something completely different, whatever it is immerse yourself in whatever your love language is with God so that you too can just be still and know that He is God in your life.